Funky

So, I am totally in a funk. It is just so weird not having anything to do all day--I mean I make a big production of going to Costco or Target, but that's about it. My family is not particularly close to me (geographically, I mean), my sister works a lot, and I left all my friends in Holly Springs. I guess I just feel a little bit lonely. It's hard to work up the energy to actually do much--I really just want to sit in my room all day and sleep and read. Not that I am completely depressed, because I am not, just kinda bored.

I feel bad because the kids have been watching too much t.v. They aren't interested in playing in the backyard because it's too hot, and I haven't taken them to the pool, because last time we went it was FREEZING from all the rain and the lower then usual temps. Now it's ninety again, and I wil probably work up the energy later today to get everyone dressed for the pool, get all the gear together, drive over (because even though it is close enough to walk, Jackie walks slower then molasses in January), get everyone in and out and in the shower (we totally take advantage of the shower at the pool and use it for personal bathing after the kids swim! I mean, I don't shower, but I give all the kids their shower there.). I wish I didn't view it as such an ordeal--but I do, even when i am in the best of moods. Regardless, I do it. It's just something we do as parents, isn't it? We may not really feel it, but we suck it up and do it for the sake of our kids. As much as it may bore us, it is what creates happy memories for them. Not that I'm saying that everything I do with the kids bores me, but some of it does. Going to the children's museum...We go about once a month and it bores me to tears! I mean all I do is count my kids (1,2,3...ok) and watch other parents either sit on the sidelines like me or more often sit with their mommy friend sipping Starbucks and totally ignoring their kids. But the kids love it! So, we go and I never regret it. Sometimes, it's just mustering up the motivation to do something that is the hard part...once we get there it is not as bad as we thought.